whatareyouthinking

Tripp was talking to one of his classmates while his teacher was giving the lesson.  To avoid singling out Tripp, the teacher made a general statement, saying, “There is to be no talking to your neighbor.” 

Unchagrinned, Tripp continued the conversation with his classmate until his teacher became infuriated.  She said, “Tripp, you heard what I said. There is to be no talking to your neighbor!”

Pointing to his classmate, Tripp innocently said, “I wasn’t.  I was talking to him.  And I don’t even have a cell phone.”

Tripp was assigned to a larger and better office at his place of employment.  Here he could have greater control over his own environment.  Sadly, the first few days were already quite uncomfortable for him as he found his new domain too warm, causing him to perspire. 

One of Tripp’s colleages, who was familiar with the office, told him about the thermostat, saying, “Tripp, your new place comes with a thermostat.  You can make it more comfortable simply by adjusting the temperature setting.  Just move the dial a little to the left and you will make the office cooler.”

Tripp effusively hurried back to his new office to do what his friend had recommended.  He turned the dial to the left, lowering the current setting by five or six degrees.  A minute passed without him noticing any signifigant change in the temperature so he said, “That didn’t work.”  Then Tripp moved back to the place where he was before.   

Tripp heard a joke.  Tripp knew that it was a joke, but he could not figure out what made it funny.  There were others around him who also heard the joke and Tripp noticed they were all laughing.  Not wanting to look out of place, Tripp found himself laughing too.  Tripp didn’t get the joke, but he figured there must have been something to it in order for everyone around him to find it so funny. 

Since it seemed to make everyone else laugh, Tripp decided to repeat the joke.  Everywhere Tripp went, he would tell people the joke and many would laugh, even though Tripp himself never understood the joke. 

After some time Tripp wondered whether anyone really did get the joke, or if the others were merely laughing for the same reason that he had been laughing. 

Tripp’s wife was watching their four-year-old niece one weekend but had much difficulty controlling her.  To Tripp’s wife’s horror, the young girl picked up Tripp’s tobacco pipe and pretended to smoke.  Tripp’s wife yelled at the girl, saying, “If you don’t put that pipe down right this minute, I am going to blow up the house!” 

The girl did not respond to her threat, so several minutes later Tripp’s wife agressively seized the pipe from her neice’s hand but did not end up blowing up the house that day.  Then Tripp’s wife said, “I just can’t seem to get this girl to listen to me.”

Tripp is a recurring character of many stories on this site.  By now, one of my readers (who doesn’t already know) is bound to be somewhat curious about him.  Who is Tripp Walkup?  

The name is a result of two separate customer records that flashed upon my screen while working in a call center back in 1996.  A name hybrid, if you will.  And I have been getting a lot of mileage from it.  It just so happened that one customer had the first name of Tripp, a very unusual name I thought.  Another customer had the last name of Walkup.  Another strange name.  I put the two together and gave birth to Tripp Walkup.  

Repeat the full name aloud or silently to yourself enough times and it will make sense to you.  Tripp, Walkup, Tripp, Walkup, Tripp, Walkup…  

Now think of Tripp like “trip” — the frequent precursor to a fall.  Think of Walkup as in getting back on one’s feet after a fall.  The name itself connotes a perpetual stumbling block; a life of ups and downs. And Tripp is often a stumbling block — to himself.

Although Tripp is a fictitious character, the stories are true.  And some of them may have even taken place. 

Tripp and his wife were sitting outside when Tripp pointed to an injured cat.  The cat was almost lifeless as it lay in their yard near the curb of the road.  They also noticed another cat passing by, paying no attention to the injured cat.

Tripp turned to his wife and said, “you think that other cat would have stopped to help.”

Tripp’s wife left the party for a moment to use the restroom.  Unbeknownst to her, she seated herself on a faulty toilet.  A crack was stemming from the base to the bowl and Tripp’s wife was no small woman.  Shortly thereafter, the toilet split and consequently pulled Tripp’s wife into an uncomfortable mess.  Fortunately, a well-prepared party guest was able to provide her with a quick change of clothes.

Once Tripp’s wife was all cleaned up and as good as new, she announced, “Toilets are bad.  I will not be using them anymore.”

Tripp had been wanting to move South for a long time and often tried to convince his family how much better such a move would be for all of them.  One weekend, he piled everyone in the car for a road trip.  After several hours of travel, Tripp’s family reached the exit for their future home town. 

Being unfamiliar with the territory, Tripp accidentally found himself in the right lane as he was nearing the end of the exit ramp.  He actually needed to make a left-hand turn.  So Tripp activated his left turn signal and surveyed the traffic situation behind him.  Someone slowed down their vehicle and waved to Tripp, motioning for him to enter the left lane. 

Tripp cheerfully accepted the offer as he announced to his family, “See, people are much nicer here.” 

In his early years, Tripp spent some time at his Grandparent’s house.  One day, all of his hard playing caused him to grow hungry long before his Grandmother was ready to start dinner.  So Tripp asked her for something to eat and she agreed to make him a peanut butter and jelly sandwich.  Then she handed him the sandwich, saying, “Tripp, now you must not have too many of these because they will cause your brain to rot.”

A few years later, Tripp was frequently making his own peanut butter and jelly sandwiches.  His mother saw this and thought things would go well for Tripp should he not eat so many of them.  So she approached Tripp and said, “You must not eat so many of those sandwiches because they will cause your brain to rot.”  In those days, Tripp was willing to part with a few brain cells and continued to eat peanut butter and jelly sandwiches as often as he wished.  Eventually, Tripp would hear this same wisdom from many of his family members.

Later in life, Tripp began experiencing some memory problems so he went to the doctor to see if he could get some help.  Tripp said to his doctor, “I seem to be experiencing some memory problems.  Now I have significantly cut down on my peanut butter and jelly consumption.  What else do you think could be causing this problem?”

Tripp knew he had a lot of housework to complete.  He looked around at the overwhelming mess surrounding him.  The kitchen, the living room, the bathroom—all were in complete disarray. 

Not knowing where to start, he sat down at his computer and decided to write a book about how he planned to go about doing it.